The Servants of Silence I: The World of the Four-Year-Old
Words: 621
Rated G: Appropriate for all age groups.
The World of the Four-Year-Old
Being a four-year-old is a cut throat business. You have four years to model yourself after those humans that have trained you in how to be a human, four years to learn how to interact with your peers and four years to learn how to be in the upper echelon of those who will eventually judge you in your four-year-old world. There is no patience or impatience in a four-year-old’s world for the learning process. There is also no compassion or attempts to better understand other four-year-olds in their world. Teachers and parents can attempt to force equal participation, and some four year olds may obey in a begrudging manner, but often times this makes matters worse for those that are a step behind when the upper echelon feels compelled to involve them.
Psychologists state that our personalities are fully formed by age six. Many find such a notion hard to believe but compelling at the same time. Psychologists say that if you were to meet someone that you knew at six years old, and you remembered their personality, you would not see a remarkable difference in them at age forty-six.
Some find that impossible to believe. They state that we have too many experiences that shape us between age six and forty-six for our personalities to remain stagnant over that period of time. These psychologists remain firm. They state that our manner in dealing with crises and substantive events remain consistent from six years old on, and while events may shape us to some degree the foundation that we achieve by age six is the one that will carry us throughout the rest our lives.
Those psychologists that find this notion impossible to believe state that we change so dramatically every ten years that we basically become new people every ten years of our life. It is a series of decent debates that each of us needs to grapple with, but let’s stay with the former for the purpose of this discussion. Let’s say that our personality is formed at six. That leaves precious, little time for the four year old to hurry up and get formed.
What happens to the four year old that isn’t in the “in crowd” of other four year olds? Are they, as we believe, so young that they don’t understand what is going on, or do they forever believe that they are outsiders in life based upon that which happens to them when they’re four?
In the beginning, the outsiders begin to rely on their teachers and parents to compel others to allow them entrance. ‘If you don’t let me play,’ they may say, ‘then I’m telling.’ This strategy, of course, will not work forever. The question becomes are parents and teachers helping both parties become more compassionate and inclusive, or are they creating a larger divide between the haves and the have nots?
We learn a lot in our maturation about what makes another slower, but do we ever reach beyond ourselves to incorporate the ones that are a step behind? In conversation, when we’re in a large function, do we reach out to those less capable of conversation? We may, symbolically, because we are advanced creatures with complicated minds, and we are generous people, but when we seek the entertainment of normal conversation we reach back to the primal state of the four year old and ostracize the people who don’t stimulate our minds in some fashion.
Who are these people who don’t make us laugh, think or contemplate our greater existence, are they servants to their silence, and what do they do when even their most immediate loved ones begin to accidentally forget about them in life?
