Hollywood and the la-la land of the liberals


hollywoodlandThe Hollywood sign in Los Angeles used to have a ‘land’ suffix affixed to it.  Hollywoodland was the sign that used to rest in the area of the Mount Lee, Santa Monica Mountains now inhabited by the famous Hollywood sign.  The city’s chamber of commerce simply removed the last four letters from the sign in 1949.  Did the change have anything to do with an association the suffix may have had with the term “la-la land” that some derisively call the town?  Or could it be that the ‘land’ suffix may have made the town sound like an amusement park or something out of Disney movie?  Did city planners and movie moguls know that adults wouldn’t be able to take anything seriously coming from a town with such a suffix?  Some would tell you that with the juvenile, thoughtless, emotive projects that come out of the land year after year, the town should have that ‘land’ suffix permanently affixed to it.

For some, nothing could be further from the truth.  The scripture that comes out of Hollywoodland is akin to that which Moses walked down from Mount Sinai.  Argue with them, or one of the members of their intelligentsia, and you’ll be bombarded with movie quotes in a manner similar to that which religious people quote scripture.  Hollywoodland screenwriters and directors make some people’s dreams come true in Hollywoodland.  Religious folk appear nice in the beginning of some of these programs, for example, but they are soon exposed for everything every that “some people” believe religious folk should be exposed for.  Republicans seem like people in the beginning of some of the productions in Hollywoodland, until the special effects guys can add the warts, the pounds of foam rubber, and the makeup required to make the horrific monster the director is looking to create to reveal Republicans for everything “some people” believe Republicans should be revealed for.

Cigarettes are out in Hollywoodland.  The filthy, disgusting habit has been listed taboo by people who care, and they can no longer appear in movies, or on TV, for fear of influencing children to take up smoking cigarettes.  The characters in these productions can smoke, but it had better be marijuana that they’re smoking if they hope to get their scenes past network censors and the special interest groups that monitor movies and TV.  One has to wonder if network censors and special interest groups now examine each cigarette, in the manner of a TSA agent, to make sure there is no tobacco in the cigarettes used in movies and TV.   Marijuana advocates would tell you that there’s nothing wrong with the marijuana herb. “It’s natural,” they say.  “Marijuana comes from mother earth.”  Tobacco comes from big business, and movie makers refuse to participate in the Svengali-like approach Big tobacco companies take to getting young kids to smoke tobacco.  Pot is fine though…If a movie maker feels compelled to depict their character with a bad habit to give them cool, bad guy mojo.

Children are told to sacrifice quality parenting in TV and the movies.  They are told that they are selfish for wanting to have a clean parent who will be there for them.  Children are mature in most of these productions.  The parents, by contrast, are juvenile, self-absorbed, and out of control, but we come to find out that the parents are victims of circumstance.  The parents’ parents treated them poorly, thirty years ago, and that’s why they’re so inept and incompetent now.  That’s why they turn to their child (in the show) and say, “I gave birth to you, what more do you want?”  This was the credo and theme of the television show Rosanne.  Ally McBeal then took the switching of roles, between adults and children, to a new level.  These two shows, and this mentality is prevalent in today’s shows.  As Roger Ebert said, “If it works once in Hollwoodland, try, try, and try it again.”

The guilty are believed to be innocent in the entertainment productions of the day, and we always find out that they are genuinely innocent by the end of the show.  This is particularly the case if the perp is a minority of some kind.  Some of these shows and movies even depict the innocent man being executed by a bunch of blood thirsty, unintelligent law enforcement officials.  This has happened so often in these venues that some people would be shocked to learn that no person has been executed with demonstrable evidence that’s come out later to prove their innocence, but it could be true if one clicks his heels, and closes his eyes hard enough, and tunes into NBC’s show of the week at nine eastern, eight central.

Illegal immigration is “just people wanting to come over here” in the movies and on TV.  There are no consequences to the flood of 10 million plus into this country.  Just leave them alone.  Your ancestors were immigrants at one time.  Legal/illegal schmiel/schmazel.  They didn’t have such draconian immigration laws when your immigrant ancestors came here.  Why?  I don’t know.  Schmiel/schmazel.

And if you wish upon a star, in Hollywoodland, you can get a doctrinaire liberal such as Alec Baldwin and Richard Dreyfuss to depict how evil conservatives truly are.  Are these depictions fair?  Yes.  Just ask them.  They’ll tell you that the roles are thoroughly researched and based on true events.  This is an arena where they determine the logistics in the pre-fight negotiations.  This is an arena where they can give you an objective and bipartisan view about how Republicans aren’t just wrong they’re evil and mean-spirited and corrupt and bloodthirsty, and wouldn’t all be better off if they had more sex when they were in college?  Never forget that “mean people suck” these stars will read in varying words from the varying scripts screenwriters hand them, and never forget that it is the Republicans that are the mean ones.

Sex is equivalent to ATM transactions in that there are never consequences in their arena.  Drug trafficking is just a way to make money, and there are never consequences.  Find a way to break the law, or someone’s moral code, and do what you feel.  Revelations occur when they progress to the obligatory scene where the star ruminates on the emptiness of his existence.  The characters say nothing about the manner in which they’ve lived their lives to this point, and how that may have led to such feelings of emptiness.  No, they’re victims of circumstance.  Mom and Dad were mean to them.

Children play a key role in liberal movies and shows.  It is through the children—of the otherwise adolescent parents—that far-left screenwriters and directors get the heart of their message out without offending the audience.  Who could be offended by something a seven-year-old says?  “It’s just a seven-year-old Harvey, quit being so uptight!” The children in these shows usually love music that is 40 years older than they are, and it’s usually the old hippie, stoner music that only the screenwriter or the director’s age could enjoy.  As many of us know, music is something we progress towards.  When we’re kids and teens, we listen to the most simplistic, pop music that floods the airwaves, but as our brain matures most of us progress to more complex and mature music.  In Hollywoodland, the kids in these shows magically progress to forty-something music.  On the same note, these children of otherwise adolescent adults, somehow magically progress their ideological thought to a forty-something level.  The writers know that if their forty year old main character spouts such far left rants, that character may lose the appeal necessary to carry the show to the next season, and a demographic may be lost.  If a child says it, no matter how preposterous and complex the chunks of political dialogue may be, it seems cute that a kid would be quoting Dwight D. Eisenhower’s military-industrial exit speech.  The kid’s seven, but we’re supposed to consider his take for a moment, because he says it with such passion and aplomb.  It may sound like drivel coming from a forty year old, but from a seven year old it’s somehow cute, and it’s supposed to make us think too.

Scientists and reporters are always right in the movies and on TV, and the military is always wrong.   The military, as perceived by liberal screenwriters and directors, are bloodthirsty, extremists, and out of control wack-a-doodles that want to blow up the world with the new devices they’ve obtained.  The members of the military are usually the first ones the monster eats in the movies and TV, because either they don’t know how to fight, or they don’t know how to talk to the monster.  The main star, the 85 lb. starlet with enormous cans, can thwart the monster attack with a couple of percussion enriched, ninja style moves, but the military men just stand there and scream while the monster systematically rips them apart.  It’s later pointed out that if the military taught their soldiers some diplomacy, they would know that the monster is just lonely, and he needs someone to talk to about the abandonment he’s felt since his mom left the house when he was twelve.  He wants someone to know that’s why he gets so mad.  He’s not evil.  There’s no such thing as good and evil in Hollywoodland.  Everyone is just trying to find their yellow brick road to happiness.  Even with all that’s happened, and everything we’ve learned about the monster, the few remaining military men still have to shoot something.  They’re bloodthirsty, they’ve never progressed beyond the third grade (to follow the characterization Senator John Kerry has of all military personnel) and the only thing these awful human beings know is killing.  Even at this point in the movie where the heroine reporter/scientist and the monster are embracing and crying, and we’ve all come to the understanding that this monster is as harmless as Sesame Street’s Grover, the cigarette smoking, bloodthirsty, extremist, out of control, military man still wants to shoot this furry, beloved creature.  It is then that Grover stomps on the military men and crushes them to smithereens, and we all cheer, and we all thank whatever deity or force they worship in Hollywoodland that the actors playing reporters and scientists are still around to plug some sense into our nonsensical, militaristic universe.

We have all come to realize that men in the military don’t show restraint in the field thanks to Hollywoodland.  We’ve all come to realize that if they bring a monster to the fight, we’ll bring a reporter or a scientist to talk some sense into them, and it will all work out when Danny Elfman’s music leads us into the outro.

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