Bill O’Reilly’s Killing Jesus vs. Zealot, by Reza Aslan


Prior to the killing of Jesus, there was a much more monumental (at the time) killing of a leader named Julius Caesar. This assassination of Julius Caesar led, in a circuitous fashion, to the assassination of Jesus of Nazareth. The resultant, and relative, degree of chaos that occurred in Rome, as a result of Caesar’s assassination, spawned chaos in the many Roman territories, including: (what is now called) Israel, Jerusalem, and Galilee. Much of this chaos, and the subsequent insecurity of the rulers, and leaders of this era, led to the crucifixion of Jesus of Nazareth. This is the theme of Bill O’Reilly, and Martin Dugard’s book Killing Jesus. Reza Aslan’s book Zealot has a theme that “Jesus of Nazareth was a ‘politically conscious Jewish revolutionary’ whose kingdom is decidedly of this world,” and that much of what you’ve been told about Jesus is wrong.

Reza Aslan
Reza Aslan

If your goal is to believe that much of what “you might have heard in a Palm Sunday sermon” is false, and you want to have those preconceived notions backed up, then you will probably love Aslan’s telling of the tale of Jesus of Nazareth in his book Zealot. If it’s your goal to uncover a truth about a violent, angry, and revolutionary Jesus of Nazareth, the theme of Reza Aslan’s Zealot will probably support that bias. This theme, as described in reviews in the Chicago Tribune, The Washington Post, The New York Times, The Nation, and the Jewish Review of Books, is pervasive throughout the Biblical passages and quotations that Reza Aslan chooses to illustrate the point that Jesus of Nazareth was a Zealot.

The point these reviews make, in varying ways, is that Aslan cherry picks Biblical passages and quotes to bolster his point, while ignoring, or being highly skeptical of, those that don’t. As Michael Robbins points out in his Chicago Tribune piece:

“It’s fashionable to claim that (Saul) Paul of Tarsus (the man that spread the word of Jesus, after Jesus’ death) watered down Jesus’ original revolutionary message, but the truth is that we just don’t know.”

This line: “We just don’t know..” the total historical truth of the actions of the man named Jesus, is the theme of so many of the reviews of Aslan’s book, that it borders on a total dismissal of the book. Jesus may have been an angry and violent revolutionary, or He may have been the passive figure that other authors choose to depict Him as, but in the end we just don’t know.

As Aslan, himself, wrote in his notes on Zealot, “(T)here is some truth in both views.” This line calls to mind the: “Both sides are to blame” line that talking heads issue, on political television shows, when they can’t properly defend the comments, or positions, of their favorite political leaders.

Michael Robbins uses Aslan’s line to conclude that: “Aslan is sometimes more confident in his pronouncements than is warranted.” If Aslan used this line in his text, it probably wouldn’t have led to Aslan achieving a best-seller, and it probably wouldn’t have made for a very good read, but it probably would’ve silenced all the criticism that followed.

Michael Robbins goes on to claim that it was wrong for a Fox News interviewer to ask, of Reza Aslan: “You’re a Muslim, so why did you write a book about the founder of Christianity?” (Editor’s note: I’m sure Aslan loved it, as that very question, when wrapped around the world via Youtube, propelled Zealot to the best-seller list, and it gave all of Zealot’s sympathetic reviewers a qualifier before dismissing the book.) Robbins also claims that all of the one-star reviews on the book, on Amazon.com, are unfair, as is the fact that far too many have condemned Aslan for writing a book that goes against scripture, but Robbins concludes all this condemnation with: “I just wish I didn’t have to report that the book itself is, well, not very good.”

In his second piece on the book ZealotThe New York Times writer Russ Douthat, attempts to defend Aslan by writing that the totality of Aslan’s research is not great, but it’s better than some of the ridiculous notions put forth by other, supposedly more credentialed, theological writers.  He then provides a list of examples of these ridiculous notions, before writing:

“To be clear, these examples are not intended to absolve (Reza) Aslan of the sin of writing a bad book; they do not suffice to make the argument in “Zealot” convincing; and they don’t justify its self-regarding author in his claims to extraordinary expertise. I agree with his recent critics on those counts and many others. All I’m saying is that by the standards of both the larger genre and Aslan’s specific academic influences, the book could have been a whole lot worse.”{2}

Washington Post writer Stephen Prothero, suggests that the theme of Aslan’s Zealot is built on two scenes: Jesus’s thrashing, and overturning, of the tax collecting tables in the public courtyard of the Jerusalem Temple, and Jesus’s ride into Jerusalem.

“The rest of the book,” writes Prothero, “is devoted to fleshing out this portrait.”

Aslan describes the scene of Jesus entering Jerusalem as:

“The moment that “more than any other word or deed, helps reveal who Jesus was and what Jesus meant.” This scene has been described as an illiterate peasant entering Jerusalem, riding on a donkey, as riotous crowds shout “Hosanna!” But Jesus of Nazareth is not demonstrating his humility, as you might have heard in a Palm Sunday sermon. He is demonstrating his kingship. “The long-awaited messiah — the true King of the Jews — has come to free Israel from its bondage” to Rome.

“In Aslan’s telling, these two scenes introduce a “revolutionary zealot who walked across the Galilee gathering an army of disciples” to rain “God’s wrath . . . down upon the rich, the strong, and the powerful.”{3}

The key line, of this particular portion of the text is: “As you might have heard in a Palm Sunday sermon.” This line basically suggests that one of Aslan’s goals is to tweak those who ascribe to religious doctrine and entice those who don’t. One would think that if Aslan’s goal was to simply factually refute everything we might have heard, he would not have been so theatrical in his verbiage. As evidenced by this particular line, however, Aslan knew who his audience would be, and he definitely appealed to them… Thanks, in part, to Fox News.

There have been so many books written on the life of Jesus that we can look at them, collectively, and say that the approach that any author takes on approaching the sometimes loose information we have says more about the author than it does about Jesus the man, or His story.

Aslan is skeptical of any Biblical quotes that depict Jesus as a peaceful revolutionary, while fleshing out the quotes and passages that make him appear violent. Aslan’s focus, in other words, are all those passages and quotations that support his theme. He is no more objective than those on the other side of the argument, who are routinely castigated as lacking in objectivity. Aslan’s objective is simply different.

The negative reviews of Bill O’Reilly and Martin Dugard’s Killing Jesus suggest that O’Reilly’s approach involved selections of Dugard’s research that focused too much on Jesus’s plight against taxation, and the moves He made to interrupt the money flow. The negative reviews suggest that O’Reilly cherry picked information that would’ve otherwise illuminated the idea that Jesus’s plight was more against the rich in general.

Bill O'Reilly
Bill O’Reilly

Candida Moss, in an article titled Five Things Bill O’Reilly flubs in ‘Killing Jesus’ for CNN, also suggests that O’Reilly and Dugard were in error when writing that (Saul) Paul of Tarsus was a Christian, “(Paul) was a Jew who moved from one branch of Judaism to another”; “that (the disciple) Peter chose to be hung upside down, because he didn’t believe himself worthy of being executed in the same manner as Jesus” (that was a 5th century interpretation); that O’Reilly sought questionable Roman records in his depiction of the pre-Jesus era Rome, that Mary Magdalene didn’t wash Jesus’s feet in oil, and that women weren’t treated better in Jesus’s time, if those women were slaves.”{4} Some of these criticisms have been deemed arguable, and others have claimed them to be outright false. Many critics have also condemned the style that O’Reilly uses to convey Martin Dugard’s research in “the Killing” series, but O’Reilly expressed, before the first of the series, Killing Lincoln, was on the shelves, that it was his goal was to make history interesting, by writing these books in the fast-paced style of a John Grisham book.

Those who have read Doris Kearns Goodwin, David McCullough, and H.W. Brands, among others, know the niche that Dugard and O’Reilly carved out. These top historians all write excellent books, but they also do most of their own research. The reason the latter half of this point is germane is that these authors feel compelled to show the readers the research, and the work that they’ve done. One has to sympathize with them, to some degree, for if a researcher has done five years of research, and they begin to realize that, say, six months of that research can be whittled down to a single sentence, the researcher in them cannot help but feel that those six months were otherwise wasted … if they don’t expand on the point a little. On the flip side of the coin, when that same researcher belabors a point that could’ve been whittled down to a single sentence, it leaves the reader feeling exhausted by detail. Therefore, when O’Reilly hires a researcher, and thereby avoids the conceit of displaying the researcher’s effort, it can lead to a much more interesting read, and a renewed interested in the subject of History for many.

Anytime an historical tome is written, it should be 100% accurate, and when it isn’t a Candida Moss, and anyone else, who offers these corrections (and others) should be applauded for their fact-checking. Having said that, none of the corrections that I’ve read from Ms. Moss, and others, take away from the overall effort put forth in Killing Jesus … in my humble opinion. Aslan’s Zealot, on the other hand, has been so summarily dismissed, by even seemingly sympathetic critics, that an objective observer can’t help but think that it has to be judged a failed effort.

Overall, these reviews suggest that O’Reilly chose information, gleaned from Martin Dugard’s research, that included some hyperbole from Popes, and other arguable interpretations, that led to what some critics have defined as factual errors, but the theme of O’Reilly and Dugard’s book has not been as thoroughly dismissed as Aslans. The errors that Aslan made, write these critics, were made to support his theme. He was skeptical of any quotes that made Jesus appear peaceful, but his theme was heavily influenced by those quotes and passages that made Jesus appear to be a violent revolutionary, and Aslan expounded upon them with interpretation.

{1}http://www.chicagotribune.com/features/books/ct-prj-0825-zealot-reza-aslan-20130823,0,3364171.story

{2} http://douthat.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/08/14/in-defense-of-reza-aslan/?_r=0

{3}http://articles.washingtonpost.com/2013-08-02/opinions/40991405_1_palm-sunday-scholar-jesus-s

{4}http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2013/10/04/five-things-bill-oreilly-gets-wrong-in-killing-jesus/

A Book Review: of Brett Martin’s Difficult Men


Difficult menBrett Martin’s book Difficult Men, is a writer’s dream, in that it finally gives credit where credit is due. It doesn’t give undue credit where so many other, lesser periodicals, give credit, to the stars. It doesn’t give undue credit to the directors of the individual episodes, the “brave” networks that eventually broadcast them, or that individual studio exec that provided the show its green light. It does give credit, finally, to those who rarely receive the amount of credit they are due in the court of public opinion, the writer. Martin is more specific in his dispersal of credit when he says it’s not just any writer that deserves credit for the success of these shows, it is the writer, the creator, the head writer, the emperor of the room, or what he calls the show runner.

“The show-runner,” writes Martin in a GQ piece, “is this era’s version of the Creative Titan.”{1}

The amount of credit currently given to star James Gandolfini, for the success of the show The Sopranos, is entirely disproportionate to the amount of credit owed show runner David Chase; Jon Hamm’s acting ability, and his rugged good looks are a reason that people tuned into Mad Men, but the overall quality of the show is primarily due to the writing, and the obsession, of show runner Matthew Weiner; and Bryan Cranston isn’t Breaking Bad as much as Vince Gilligan is. Martin does give some credit to the stars, and to some of the individual writers of individual episodes, and to some of the other behind-the-scenes players of each show, but he maintains that these shows wouldn’t have been a fraction as good as they were, if they were in less capable hands than those listed as creator, or show runner.

This isn’t to say that Martin’s book Difficult Men is as obsessed with credit dispersal as I am. He simply focuses his narrative on the history of these show runners, and the work each of them did throughout the life of the project in question. The rest of us can’t help but be obsessed with credit, especially when so many of our friends misdirect it to the stars.

James Gandolfini is the face of The Sopranos, of course, and Jon Hamm is the face of Mad Men, so most of us can’t help but associate them with the shows, and subsequently give them all the credit. Just as we can’t help but believe Basic Instinct is Sharon Stone’s movie, and her coming out vehicle, and the movie where she showed a vital organ. Very few people have even heard of Joe Eszterhas and Paul Verhoeven. Everyone knows that Christopher Reeves was Superman, but how many people know the name Mario Puzo? How many people, on that note, know what Mario Puzo’s relationship to “Marlon Brando’s” The Godfather is? How many of those who love Entertainment Tonight, and their red carpet interviews, know anything about what happens behind the scenes of their favorite movies and TV shows, and how many would care if they did?

Those of us who care, and wish the creative types received more credit in the public arena than they do, have tried to stay in tune with the creative drivers of the projects we love, and we subsequently became obsessed with knowing which party deserves the credit for each production. Martin’s book Difficult Men informs us that we have been wrong in our credit dispersal when it comes to TV.

Prior to reading this book, I assumed that in TV, like the movies, the directors rule. Those of us who love movies, for example, know that a Scorsese movie is almost always great, regardless of the star who leads it, the screenwriter who writes it (unless it’s Scorsese), or any of the behind the scenes players involved in it. Therefore, we obsessives have habitually searched through the credits of TV shows to see who the director was to determine if that show will be any good or not. Martin informs us, through a Matthew Weiner quote, that movie goers are dead wrong in their assumption that directors have the same amount of power in TV that they do in the movies.

Those of us that love books, also lived with the somewhat sanctimonious assumption that individual writers were more of an essential ingredient to TV shows, but we didn’t put enough thought to the concentration of power that had to be assumed by the head writer, or “emperor” of the writing room, to keep it all consistent.

Here’s what most of us thought. We knew that there had to be an “emperor” of the writing room, but we thought that an individual writer, of an individual episode, simply handed the finished draft to the head writer, and that head writer then either outright rejected it, or added a few notes here and there to spruce up the final product. We thought that the head writer acted in a manner similar to an editor of a freelance magazine, and he would continually reject an individual writer’s product, until it was perfect. We also knew each episode had a “writing room’s” influence on the finished product, but we had no idea—as in the case of Weiner and Mad Men—that the head writer, or the show runner, rewrote an average of eighty percent of every episode that was handed to him. We were the ones trying to dissuade our star-obsessed friends of the notion that the stars were the end all of a given product, and that it had more to do with the individual writers. Yet, we were even wrong by a matter of degrees. Martin writes that a show runner is, in general, and specific to these particular shows, the person that dreamed up the general premise of the show, wrote the show’s bible, and controlled and edited every aspect of that show.

Martin’s description of the process is as follows: The writing team meets behind closed doors, they put in an ungodly amount of hours trying to come up with ideas for each individual episode. One writer will then eventually take the lead on an episode, and he and the rest of the writing team will eventually come up with a 40-50 page script. Once they have completed this script, the show runner will walk into the room, take the script to his office, and rewrite 80% of it, on average. For most shows, the next step in the process involves a debate between the studio execs, network censors, and the show runner over what they believe will be popular and acceptable to audiences and sponsors. With these three particular shows, however, the show runners state that this part of the process rarely involved much in the way of this intrusion.

Show runner of AMC’s Mad Men, Matthew Weiner, illustrates his role as the show runner in the following description:

“Over 80 percent (of writing on TV) is rewriting, and if I’ve rewritten more than 80 percent of a writer’s script, I’m going to attach my name to it. If I keep 20 percent or more, of one of my writers’ scripts, I’ll give them a lone writing credit. Basically, it’s a question of ego. I can’t stomach the idea of someone not knowing that I was involved in it. For the well-being of my daily interaction with the people I work with, I felt it best not to have to watch somebody go up and get an award for something I had written every word of. I’m not Cyrano de Bergerac.”

The one asterisk to the process described above, for these three particular shows, is Breaking Bad, as show runner Vince Gilligan regards the process as a more democratic one than Weiner, Chase, or even Deadwood’s creator David Milch do.  It should also be mentioned, in this paragraph of asterisks, that Brett Martin’s Difficult Men covers a number of other shows in Difficult Men, including: The Wire, The Shield, Six Feet Under, and to a lesser degree Deadwood and Dexter. All of these shows, writes Martin, comprise what critics call the Third Golden Age, but I regard The Sopranos, Mad Men, and Breaking Bad as the triumvirate of it.

Another little talked about aspect of these three shows, that turned out to be essential to the show’s long term success, was the main star’s willingness to acquiesce to the show runner’s ideas of where the character should go. Most stars are not willing to concede characteristics of “their character”, because it will reflect upon them more than the show runners. Most stars are not willing to put themselves in compromising positions, and they’re not brave enough to look bad on screen with the fear that it could affect the rest of their careers. Cranston, and to some degree Gandolfini, weren’t afraid to have themselves portrayed on screen in their underpants, which Vince Gilligan says is a “pretty good physicalization of their fearlessness.” These stars had to be willing to be very “un-starlike” for these particular shows to have the kind of flawed weaknesses that eventually made them monumental.

As stated throughout Difficult Men, the egomaniacal nature of the show runners was paramount to the success of these shows. It dictated to the stars that they would acquiesce, but it also dictated to the networks that they would have to acquiesce too. Had any of these show runners sacrificed their egos, and gone with the “suggested” tweaks of the studio execs that eventually rejected these shows—just to finally get their project made—these shows surely would’ve been different, and possibly drained of most of the value they eventually brought to TV.

One cannot entirely blame those studio execs who passed on these shows, as they had their own bosses to answer to, their sponsors to satisfy, and their audiences to avoid offending. To get these particular projects made, the studio runners needed a vulnerable network that was less concerned with controversy, and ratings, and in having “some say” in how the finished product would appear.

“In TV, as nowhere else, the writer is king—none more so than those emperors of the air that control every aspect of an ambitious, ongoing cable drama,” Brett Martin writes in the GQ article.

I’m embarrassed to say that I never heard of this term “show runner”, until I read this book, but I did have an idea that there had to be an “emperor” of the writing room. I had these ideas of how a show was created, but I never really focused in on it, until HBO informed me, in their ad campaign, that I should watch Deadwood, because its creator, David Milch, used to work on The Sopranos. AMC ran a similar campaign for Mad Men, saying its creator, Matthew Weiner, wrote for The Sopranos. Other than maybe Steven Bochco, I can’t remember a creator given such prominence in a show’s ad campaign, and Bochco largely created shows that I didn’t watch. I did watch The Sopranos, however, and I was willing to watch any show attached to it in anyway, especially when the ad campaign centered around the show’s artistic creativity and not the stars. The only reason AMC used the campaign they did, writes Martin, is that they couldn’t think of another way to market a show about ad men sitting around a table talking sales.

As the title of this book suggests, the stories of these three shows involve difficult, uncompromising, and flawed males, but the real story, or the story behind the story that is not commonly talked about with these shows, involves the difficult, uncompromising, and flawed males behind the scenes that got these shows made, and finessed, until they achieved the creator’s idea of perfection.

Portions of this book are devoted to the stars of the shows, but if you are purchasing this book to learn more about them, you’re probably also going to be disappointed, especially if your perspective is that they are strictly star-driven vehicles. And you’re probably going to be just as disappointed by the limited amount of space Martin devotes to Gandolfini’s psychosis, the Tweet page devoted to showing Jon Hamm crotch shots, and Bryan Cranston’s comfort level with being shot in his underwear in various episodes of Breaking Bad. That having been said, Martin’s book Difficult Men, and his perspective, is probably not what most readers would  expect, nor—sadly—enjoy, but it’s fantastic.  No reader, who makes it to the end of this book, could mistake it for a gossip piece that focuses on the daily lives of stars. It is about the creative process. It’s about quality TV.  It is about how one show, The Sopranos, influenced some relatively vulnerable cable TV networks to pursue other, similarly “important” shows, until a Third Golden Age of television was born.

Avoiding misery in the midst of the culture war


A chapter in Chuck Klosterman’s book IV asks why some people insist on making themselves miserable when the culture disagrees with their values?

“(Most of these people) don’t merely want to hold their values; they want their values to win, and this is the reason why so many people feel “betrayed” by art, consumerism, and by the way the world works.” 

The point Klosterman is making is your values are your values, but if you expect the culture to pivot to your way of thinking you’re probably going to end up making yourself miserable in your pursuit.

All of us have our own set of morals, values, and principles.  They can be instilled in us by region, parents, school, or religion, but Klosterman states that these can vary quite a bit from one group of people to another.  He states that the code you live by is not wrong, but the code that the culture has is not wrong either.  It’s just different.  Even if you disagree with him, Klosterman does have something of a point when he says that documenting points, in a sports-related mindset, is inevitably going to end in a losing proposition.  The culture is the culture, and you have to accept the fact that your code is not going to win all of the time, and if you don’t you’re probably going to end up drive yourself crazy.

Klosterman essays is largely focused on cultural tastes, regarding the manner in which some people get so upset by the fact that some people like the group Limp Bizkit over Nirvana; or that so many dumbed down novels occupy the New York Times Best Seller List; or that shows like Everybody Loves Raymond remains so popular.  He rarely mentions politics, except loosely with his “the way the world works” phrase, and a brief mention of voting patterns.  So, as one that gets upset by voting patterns,  I find it intriguing to contemplate the idea that I might one day take this so far that accidentally become a miserable person.

Is Klosterman saying that we shouldn’t defend our values?  He isn’t.  He’s saying that if you have integrity, you should be able to defeat any attempts at cultural attacks on what you think.  Can we get angry in the privacy of our own homes, without fear of being called ridiculous by Klosterman and those that can’t believe that some of us get indignant by these values obliterated on our TV?  I think so, but it is a decent point that we shouldn’t take our righteous indignation so far that we accidentally become miserable to all of those around us.

When the author suggests that we’re all going to run across “certain instances” where the culture is diametrically opposed to our values, and those oppositions are so confusing to us that we’re going to become unhappy by it, I would say he’s wrong by a matter of degrees.  I would say that I’ve encountered so many “certain instances” over the decades I’ve been watching TV that I should, by Klosterman’s definition, be a miserable person by this point.  Anyone that knows me, however, knows that while I may have a stick up my ear some of times, I’m generally a pretty happy person.

One such “certain instance” happened to me the other day, when I watched an episode of Netflix’s Orange is The New Black.  I disagree with just about everything that happens on the show, just about every character on the show, and just about everything but the credits.  (I skip the credits, so I’m sure if I watched them, I might be able to find something I disagree with in them.)  I disagree with the show, but I watch it, and I don’t become angry watching it.  I get a little ticked during some scenes, as you’ll see, but I don’t end up becoming miserable.

My problem with the show, and all shows like it, is that there is no significant debate on some of the topics I consider important and worthy of more discussion.

In one particular scene of this show, an insanely duplicitous, evil religious wacko attempts to convert the poor, “just wants-to-be-left-alone” main character to Christianity.  The main character is somewhat agreeable with going through the motions of this conversion, if it means pacifying the evil, proselytizing Christian that the main character “disrespected” in another episode.  (Sorry about all the adverbs and adjectives, but liberals love using them to describe evil, in-your-face religious people.)  So the harmless, sensible, and “truly kind” main character agrees to be baptized by the meth head, out-of-her-mind with-this-religious-stuff, and monstrous (ROAR!) Christian, until the main character sees that the water she is to be baptized in is a little dirty.

“I can’t do this,” the main character begins.  She then goes on a liberal, Bull Durham-style rant regarding things she believes in and concludes it with: “On some level we all know that this (religion) is BS don’t we?”  She then proceeds, in that condescending meme of all snearing non-religious types talking to religious people: “I wish I could get on that ride, I’m sure I would be much happier.”  (Translation, I am just too intelligent for religion.) Feelings aren’t enough,” she says, “I need it to be real.”

This clichéd response is the ultimate form of hypocrisy in a world where most non-religious, demand that religious types be respectful of all opposing viewpoints and lifestyles.  When a religious person fails to be open-minded to lesbianism, for example, they’re called narrow minded.  When a TV show ridicules and sneers at religious people, saying, ‘I wish I could be more open-minded to your set of beliefs, but I’m not as dumb as you,’ it’s called a yuppie, coming-of-age narrative.

I honestly don’t care if anyone is religious, but this piece of dialogue simply calls for some sort of response.  I’m not saying the main character’s worldview had to be defeated, but for the sake of quality writing, for the sake of some sort of conflict in the scene, it would’ve been nice if some character had said something to provide for an interesting exchange.  Notice I didn’t say debate.  I’m not saying that the creators of the show needed a Scopes Trial style debate.  I’m saying something would’ve been nice, something along the lines of: “Well, isn’t science wrong too … some of the times?”

If you watched this show, you saw all the scenes that led up to this point in which the hysterical, religious character was a mouthy, confrontational sort that couldn’t keep her mouth shut.  Was she rational, of course not.  She was barely lucid in most scenes —to fit the worldview of the show’s creators and writers of religious people— but until this scene, this obnoxious tart always had something to say when her beliefs system were challenged, and this scene contained more condemnation of her beliefs system than any of the prior ones.

I realize that all of the religious women in this show, save the transsexual nun, are depicted as slovenly creatures that probably would’ve felt more comfortable in the Palaeolithic Age, but they could’ve said something like, “I believe in science too.  Can’t science and religion stand hand in hand on some matters?”  At that point, another religious woman in the scene could’ve said, “Didn’t Einstein suggest that such a relationship could exist?  Didn’t he say something along the lines of: “Science without religion is lame.  Religion without science is blind.”  The combative females could’ve said, “You do believe in Einstein don’t you?” with an equal amount of snarkiness and condescension.  I realize such a line would’ve been inconsistent with the ‘barely above grunting’ characterization of the religious people on this show, but that would’ve been excellent writing as far as I’m concerned.  That would’ve provided some excellent conflict, and it could’ve ended with the main character still winning.  Instead of any of these exchanges, one of the religious women made a snarky comment about religious people believing in angels.  Boring!

Instead of some small semblance of a debate, what we get in shows like Orange is the New Black is open-mouthed awe and silence from the “Cletus the slack jawed yokel” Christian side that has obviously (you’re supposed to laugh knowingly here) never-been-in-no-science-class before.

The exaggeration of the casting  in this show has to be seen to be believed.  The main character is depicted as an urban, well groomed, beautiful woman, with beautiful teeth, while the Christians are all female meth heads with stained, and missing, teeth and unwashed, stringy hair that suggest that they, along with their beliefs, may be more comfortable in the Cro-Magnon era.  (I realize that I’m mixing eras here, but it’s hard to know where these violations of modernity would be most comfortable.)  What we get in this “secular humanist” oration scene is a main character that gets to deliver her sermon on the mount without the any form of debate on the topic.  We get slacked jawed yokels that can’t hope to compete with big words, like science.  We get a form of unchecked proselytizing that many claim the other side was guilty of in another era.

In the closing paragraphs of the “Cultural Betrayal” chapter in Chuck Klosterman’s book, IV, he basically writes that it will be your own fault if you get irrationally angry about the fact that the culture doesn’t agree with you, and you will be happy if you learn to care and not care at the same time.  You can care, in other words, but if you have integrity —“if you truly live by your ideals, and those ideals dictate how you engage with the world at large— you will never be betrayed by the culture.  You are not wrong,” he writes to close the chapter, “and neither is the rest of the world.  But you need to accept that those two things aren’t really connected.”{1}

On the point that the culture and I should be able to co-exist on separate planes, and that for my mental health it’s probably not a good idea that I reach over and try to convert the other side, I say that I’ve waved the white flag long ago.  I still attempt to competitively defeat those “certain instances” of manipulation that all writing attempts to exert on its audience, but this is not done with the hope that the culture will pivot back to me.  I just need to point out their subtle forms of manipulation and defeat them internally.  I think it’s a healthy practice that I’ve developed to challenge myself with all attacks and attempt, be it in my living room or in a blog like this, to defeat all of their theoretical arguments.  When I’m done, I’d be more than happy to shake the creator’s hand, say, “Nice try!” and go back to my respective corner to inform Mickey (Rocky reference) that I should probably be cut to prevent the kind of extensive damage that might prohibit me from coming out for the next round.

The point is that I don’t get miserable.  I don’t care that my sensibilities aren’t shared by those that write movies or shows, and I don’t expect them to pivot back in my lifetime.  I don’t care if people are religious or not, and I secretly don’t care that they’re not respectful.  As far as I’m concerned, it’s on them that they’re hypocritical in their quest for universal respect of all people in all walks of life.  It actually fuels me to write material like this when they aren’t.  If I did care, and it was eventually going to make me miserable, you would have to call me a sadomasochist for paying PAYING for HBO and Showtime over the last decade and a half.

I do know people that get miserable though, they’re out there, and I thought of them while reading this chapter, but I enjoy internally defeating those cultural attempts to change my ways of thinking.  “I don’t get miserable when I see my sensibilities getting slaughtered in the culture,” I say with an action hero’s menacing whisper, “I get competitive.”

{1}Klosterman, Chuck.  IV.  New York: Scribner, 2006. Pages 265-269.  Print.